Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Home

As our small jet flew over familiar landscapes Sunday night, I began to feel tension ease.
It was more than just an affirmation that, "No matter how Abby acts, we're almost there." It was more than a loosening of the strings binding my unease. Anytime I'm somewhere unfamiliar, the feeling of being out of control leaves me slightly tense as I wonder what's next, then what, and will Abby be OK?
It was a sigh of relief, "Ah, we're home." I spied the winding jade-coloured rivers and slightly snow-capped mountains from our airplane window. I gathered our backpack and purse, diligently stored underneath the seats in front of us, making sure to collect Abby's car, cat and shark. (It really is a dolphin, but she doesn't believe me).
As we drove in our own truck, pulling out of the airport parking lot, I took notice of the things that made this place my home. And I kept that noticing feeling around the last few days, picking up on what makes the Yukon mine, at least while I'm here.
- that laid-back feeling that things will get done, in their own time. The freedom that no one's concerned if I do or don't.
- the fireweed growing wild everywhere (I let one grow in my garden because its bloom is too pretty not to include)

- the bear sightings I heard about on the radio on the way home. I love the reminders that we share this land and that once beyond the safety of our front yard, we are at nature's mercy. This excites me.
- the familiarity that comes with living in a small town. After four years up here, I feel like I'm really getting to know the patterns, the ebbs and flows of this town. I know the faces of the stores I frequent, and can make small talk with anyone. When I moved up here I was an anonymous big city girl who kept her eyes on the sidewalk when going somewhere.
- accomplishment. This was where our marriage started and in that time we have grown so much as people. I feel infinitely more resourceful having bought and maintained a home for a year. I feel independent and confidant after living two years in isolation. I feel unconditionally supported and loved by the man who has been through a rocky start with me, and who has celebrated life's greatest wonder (Abby!)
- jeans. They are appropriate attire in almost any social situation, and I love it.

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