Sunday, May 8, 2011

Happy Mother's Day

Mother's Day is kind of a funny holiday, to me. I'm a full supporter of the idea behind it: taking one day aside to put your mama first. Lord knows the other 364 days, that same concerted effort isn't always there.
And it's a wonderful chance to reflect on how thankful we are to have a mother.
But it's not like that for everyone.
I remember it being a tough project at the school in Ross River, because some kids were not thankful for their mothers. Some hadn't seen their mother in years. Some never had. It broke my heart to think the day would come and go, reminding them of what kind of mom they were "supposed" to have.
And what about the woman who would sell her soul to be a mother. Sure, she can celebrate her mother's guidance and love. But the day causes her gut-wrenching, jaw-tightening pain because she wants so bad to be let into the club of mothers who are celebrated. It's a publicly-recognized reminder of the sadness she feels every day.
Or those who have lost their mothers? I always feel bad for my Dad, whose mother died when I was nine, because who does he celebrate today? He misses her, I know, and we miss her too. It's a reminder, a marker of another year passed without her.
I don't mean to detract from the day's celebrations by bringing everyone down. Nay, I hope thinking of those without mothers, or who aren't mothers, gives you a reason to celebrate even bigger. If you're a mother, you're living the dream. Maybe it wasn't your dream, maybe it started off as a terrifying slip of good judgement, but nonetheless, today is Mother's Day. If you are a mother, or if you have a mother you love dearly, you owe it to this sensitive, complicated, deep-rooted love to celebrate it.
You only get one mother, and however you came into her life, you are each other's soul mirrored.
These are the beautiful Begonias Abby picked out for me, all by herself I'm told.
She loves them just as much as I do! I love that they're potted,
so I can continue enjoying them for years to come.

4 comments:

  1. "...you are each other's soul mirrored". This is a very, very, VERY biased statement. Though you may have enjoyed a wonderful relationship with your mother, there are many whose mothers - or whose children - are not good humans, and by suggesting that a mother and child have a mirrored soul is hurtful to those who want nothing more than to distance themselves from an abusive mother, or who can find no common ground with a child.

    Considering that your entire post focuses on how Mother's Day means different things to different people, I find it a gross oversight and poor rationalization that your final statement generalizes all mother-child relationships.

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  2. Thank you, Anonymous, for commenting (who are you? I wonder). Thank you for challenging what I wrote, I really appreciate it.
    It's a tough thing to be disconnected from your mother, whether by choice or circumstance. There's always a tether, whether she gives you up for adoption at a young age, or whether she makes choices that damage the person you are.
    There's really no single way to categorize all mother-child relationships, you're right. What I meant to imply (although your response makes me think I should have re-phrased it), is that a mother passes on pieces of herself to her child, parts of her soul, and may not be aware of it. Passing on reflections of one's self is something that should be treasured, although you're right: not all mothers do.

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  3. Sarah,
    I love the new blog layout. It's very pretty and elegant.
    Because I love reading along with you and yours so much, I've nominated you for a blog award.
    You can head over to my blog to pick it up.
    Tonnes of love,
    nbm3
    http://ivfbug.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thank you! I'll get right on my post!

    ReplyDelete

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