Saturday, February 13, 2010

Waking Up

It's early in the morning, and Abby hasn't yet woken for the day. That leaves time for me to leisurely sip water and eat a muffing while I check e-mail, read and think in peace. A rare treat!
Last night as I drifted off to sleep I was troubled by a dichotomy of two kids' stories. I thought of how peaceful Abby was, asleep in her crib with her bum in the hair, face nuzzled into her blanket. Slowly breathing in and out, stirring only occasionally, saying, "Ba ba ba" and then returning to sleep. She knows to wake up and except her mummy to come walking in her room ready to scoop her up and shower her in kisses.
Then there is a kid in town who woke up today on the cold, hard surface of the police station floor after being rescued from the cold. He was walking around, drunk, in the middle of the night without shoes in freezing weather. He did not sleep peacefully, he did not know what to expect when he woke up.
I know this kid. He's a good, polite kid. When everyone else at school or at the library would give me a hard time about laying down the rules, he would remind everyone I'm "just doing my job", then give me a shy smile when no one else was looking. He remembers my birthday, always asks how Abby and I are doing, and has parents that try.
It makes me sad. I try hard now to avoid this sadness. If I keep my eyes open, I can see it everywhere in this town. But since becoming a mother, I can only take so much sadness in my sensitive soul before I really feel the pain. And I know I can't stop it or fix it. I hibernate in our house and smile, avoiding asking Rich how certain kids are doing after he works a shift.
This is a sad reality in Ross River, and elsewhere. Alcoholism, abuse and anger run rampant through the people born and bred here.
It makes me want to hug my baby tight and tell her every day how much I love her, even when she's flipping a plate of spaghetti on the floor.

1 comment:

  1. oh Sarah- how sad! Yet I am glad that you tell these stories, it's important that it is acknowledge.


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